


ABC Drabbles

by JadeKitsune



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: General fiction, Literature, M/M, fan fiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-09
Updated: 2017-07-26
Packaged: 2018-03-22 02:26:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 7,923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3711361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JadeKitsune/pseuds/JadeKitsune
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>A little longer on this one, thanks for the feed back guys! Once again I ask for your words, it really does help when writing.<br/><br/>So here we have another passionate dialog of feeling. </p><p>Should we move to the other two? Should we look more into the hearts of these brothers? Where oh where will we go next?</p><p>HELP!!!!</p><p>Previous: <a href="http://fav.me/d8djyt8">Affliction</a> <...>  Next: <a href="http://fav.me/d8dx3wb">Carnage</a></p>
        </blockquote>





	1. Affliction

Why? 

Why me? 

Why him?

Those deep pools of fire that burn into me every time we look into one another. That fire that fuels him through everything he does, the inner flames the lick behind those eyes. His eyes. For years I've stared into those eyes, and each time they take more of me into that inferno.

Why me? Why did I have to be the one those flames sought out to emblazon into oblivion? Of every living thing in this crazy world why did it have to be me?

I lie in bed countless nights seeing those burning eye behind the curtains of sleep. My mind is in constant motion of his every motion, the way he breathes in the thick of combat, the curve of his shell when he rests on the floor, the perfect line of muscles as he pushes his limits every day. I think about all of him, the grumble of his snores at night, the deepness of his voice when he speaks, the heat that rolls off him as we move over the city. I find everything about him powerful, strong, solid, just so...perfect. But his eyes, the very windows into his heart have left an eternal emblem on me. 

Even now as I try to calm my own fire that threatens to burn me to ash, the fire of need, the flames of desire, a heat that with each passing day prove harder to snuff out. If only it were a candle I could easily light and extinguish at a whim, maybe then I wouldn't have to practice to hard to keep these thoughts at bay. I wear a painful mask of control only to fool those around me, I hide behind my teachings and art so they won't see through to the real me.

The me that lays here in my room surrounded my the scent of incense and passion, in the dark confines of my own domain I sink into the dark flames of my own passions. In the practiced images of my inner psyche his ghosting arms wrap around me guiding my hand lower down my body. The heat of him burning my carapace as the gruff breath steams past my neck, he calls my name in his graveled voice. The images of his powerful legs pinning my own to the bed beneath us, spreading them to expose me in the more shameful ways. Guiding my hand further down to dip between my open limbs, stroking my pocket with those rough hands using my own to heighten the pleasure. He strokes me again growling in my mind to pleasure myself, guiding my off hand to my sensitive tail and giving it the long firm strokes that drive me crazy. He watches me with those golden orbs humming his approval of the vile things I do to myself, roving his gaze over my bare flesh sending the fire to burn it with those hands. His hands cover mine and begin to pump me to completion with a rough passion I just know he'll have. The powerful muscles of his biceps clenching and easing as he pumps my hardened flesh send me to a euphoric high, the memory of his breathing clouded by the shameful sound of my own as I melt further into this heat.

The nights I spend alone trapped in these hot fantasies grow in numbers and each night I want to let the fires of lust burn me until the white lava spills from my body over and over.  I want to end this nightmare, the torment I put myself through day after day hiding the black spot on my honor as his brother, his leader, his friend. But I can't stop, the fire has spread too far, I can't put it out, so once again as we return from the city above I bar myself in my sanctuary under the pretense of meditation to indulge in this flaming

Affliction. 


	2. Beautiful

Why? 

Why me? 

Why him?

Those deep pools of fire that burn into me every time we look into one another. That fire that fuels him through everything he does, the inner flames the lick behind those eyes. His eyes. For years I've stared into those eyes, and each time they take more of me into that inferno.

Why me? Why did I have to be the one those flames sought out to emblazon into oblivion? Of every living thing in this crazy world why did it have to be me?

I lie in bed countless nights seeing those burning eye behind the curtains of sleep. My mind is in constant motion of his every motion, the way he breathes in the thick of combat, the curve of his shell when he rests on the floor, the perfect line of muscles as he pushes his limits every day. I think about all of him, the grumble of his snores at night, the deepness of his voice when he speaks, the heat that rolls off him as we move over the city. I find everything about him powerful, strong, solid, just so...perfect. But his eyes, the very windows into his heart have left an eternal emblem on me. 

Even now as I try to calm my own fire that threatens to burn me to ash, the fire of need, the flames of desire, a heat that with each passing day prove harder to snuff out. If only it were a candle I could easily light and extinguish at a whim, maybe then I wouldn't have to practice to hard to keep these thoughts at bay. I wear a painful mask of control only to fool those around me, I hide behind my teachings and art so they won't see through to the real me.

The me that lays here in my room surrounded my the scent of incense and passion, in the dark confines of my own domain I sink into the dark flames of my own passions. In the practiced images of my inner psyche his ghosting arms wrap around me guiding my hand lower down my body. The heat of him burning my carapace as the gruff breath steams past my neck, he calls my name in his graveled voice. The images of his powerful legs pinning my own to the bed beneath us, spreading them to expose me in the more shameful ways. Guiding my hand further down to dip between my open limbs, stroking my pocket with those rough hands using my own to heighten the pleasure. He strokes me again growling in my mind to pleasure myself, guiding my off hand to my sensitive tail and giving it the long firm strokes that drive me crazy. He watches me with those golden orbs humming his approval of the vile things I do to myself, roving his gaze over my bare flesh sending the fire to burn it with those hands. His hands cover mine and begin to pump me to completion with a rough passion I just know he'll have. The powerful muscles of his biceps clenching and easing as he pumps my hardened flesh send me to a euphoric high, the memory of his breathing clouded by the shameful sound of my own as I melt further into this heat.

The nights I spend alone trapped in these hot fantasies grow in numbers and each night I want to let the fires of lust burn me until the white lava spills from my body over and over.  I want to end this nightmare, the torment I put myself through day after day hiding the black spot on my honor as his brother, his leader, his friend. But I can't stop, the fire has spread too far, I can't put it out, so once again as we return from the city above I bar myself in my sanctuary under the pretense of meditation to indulge in this flaming

Affliction. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little longer on this one, thanks for the feed back guys! Once again I ask for your words, it really does help when writing.  
>   
> So here we have another passionate dialog of feeling. 
> 
> Should we move to the other two? Should we look more into the hearts of these brothers? Where oh where will we go next?
> 
> HELP!!!!
> 
> Previous: [Affliction](http://fav.me/d8djyt8) <...> Next: [Carnage](http://fav.me/d8dx3wb)


	3. Carnage

They hate me...

Those who cursed me with this Affliction....they hate me.

Why? Why oh why?

Whatever God, Fate, or cruel divine being rules this existence of mine hates me. No sooner do I rid my body of it's energy through hours and hours of training I hope to seek relief in the cold waters of our bathing area. But as the cards would fall I find not only is the bath occupied but by none other than the object of my desires.

The smell of him hangs like a thick smoke in through the steam, he always smells strong after a fight and it only excels when we carry the argument home. I had hoped, wished, prayed even that like his habits show he'd fled for the night on his bike. I didn't of all things think I'd see him completely bare under the steam, water running mockingly over that forbidden flesh. 

They hate me.

Still no wishing to be awkward I turn into my own spray and try to scrub away my shame. The thoughts won't stop...the burning in my shell only gets worse as the mist takes form and my inner flames begin to show behind lids my darkest dreams. His scent flows all around me, the musk of his sex seems also to mix in the clouds. I see him turn to wash again and for once I allow my fantasies to take hold of me. I can't resists...the water flows around us, our bodies concealed by the steam from the heat of our passion. He moves silently through the small layer of water on the cold tile, proving he is just as much a master as me, but those steps are lustful and his eyes hungry. 

The stream gets louder, he has moved! Oh no did I slip? Is my face betraying me? 

I spare a glance and those burning eyes are upon me again, roaming flames caress my bare skin as he gazes upon me. I feel weak, exposed, but I don't know what to do or say for fear my voice will betray what only moments ago I had been dreaming.

"Hey Leo..." his voice..."Look 'M sorry...I know yer tryin' your best out there. An' I'm sorry, I'm a hothead..." oh but Raph that's part of what I love about you. Wait did I just...love...oh my god! I'm in LOVE with Raphael....

"Leo?"

Taking a steadying breath I try and keep my voice calm, managing it to at least be low. 

"I know, I'm sorry too Raphael. We both can be stubborn, but we came home alright right? Guess that's all we need." I smile and again those eyes, they hold so much fire and passion. In the streams of vapor they look like golden suns above the clouds. He looks as if he's trying to show me more of that fire I already know will burn my soul. 

"Ya, so we're good?" 

They hate me...

His arms spread for an embrace, I'll come undone! I'll be burned to oblivion! No! Why am I moving to him? No! Stop! Don't let him!

Bracing what self control remained and returned the gesture pleading with my very soul he doesn't see right through me. I smile in hopes it is enough. Releasing each other we return to our bathing but I can feel his eyes upon me as I move. Did he not buy it? Does he suspect? 

Part of me wishes he would embrace me again with those burning arms, scorch my heart with his passionate love, what I wouldn't give to be free!

_Chhurrr_

Oh God!

**********************************

Beautiful...I can't stop staring. My body won't move, my eyes can't turn away from the sight of his body being washes clean by the very water I see flowing through his soul. 

" _Churr"_

Did he just? My body moved on it's own, crossing the floor silently despite the water flowing over the tiles.

I know that sound, I've made it myself many times thinking of him under me. Humming into my hand that sound of pure desire. He just made that sound...why?

Wrapping my arms mutely around him so he can't run I move to look into those ocean eyes of his. Fuck! He's red as my mask an' sexy ta boot. Focus numbskull!

Looking down I see a war, he's fighting himself, for fuck's sake! 

"Whatcha want Fearless?"

His body freezes in my arms and I can sense his fear, he's afraid...of me? No there's more ta this...leaning close I rub my scent to him, pouring my heart into the motion. Please open up to me Leo! Don't fight this alone!

" _Churr churr. Oh God...Raph..I..damn!"_

His body suddenly crumbles to the floor, finally the ice has melted. I feel his tears on my shoulder. The heat around us is suffocating but I can't let go. I won't leave him like this.

Moving again I take in his scent expecting to find fear, sorrow, even loss in it but...Oh Leo!

"You smell like spring big brotha..." taking in the sweet scent again I know it well. Every time he thinks he's lone releasing his own desires top side. I smell it, the musk, his scent of need...it's like spring. He's begging for something...

"Leo, c-can I tell ya somethin' without ya freaking out on me?" All I can get is a trembling nod as his grip tightens. I feel the rush of his soul over me in a tidal wave of emotion. I know this feeling, I have it myself...damn I gotta talk before I drown in this..his...

Carnage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...What do you think?
> 
>  
> 
> Previous: [Beautiful](http://fav.me/d8doqop) <...> Next: [Damned](http://fav.me/d8dyc3l)


	4. Damned

Damned....

I've fallen to low, sunk below the point of salvation, and I love it. 

Damned for all eternity.

"You smell like spring..." Damn...

In this hell of sin and dishonor, I find peace and freedom. I can't hate it, I want this. His arms around me, the burning heat of his flesh against mine, his voice ghosting over my skin, and those brilliant eyes looking only at me. I shame myself further by showing him this sinful side of me. My face is so hot he's put me into this degrading fever, my body won't stop shaking...his words they've undone me, I'm burning inside, all around me is hot I can't control anything like this. Damn!

"Can I tell you something without ya freakin' out on me?" Again that low graveled baritone of his, I can only nod and pray. Please just tell me you hate me! That you can't stand me! Anything...I can't survive this inferno! No don't hold me tighter, please Raph I can't...

"I love ya Leo..." Wha...What did he just....

"Fuck! I love ya Leonardo. I've been beatin' myself off for months thinkin' about hold'n ya like this. I've seen you hiding your need, I've watched ya cum so many times in the shadows..." Those blazing eye burn into me as you confess this...this...impossibility. I'm undone...my soul is ash, my heart seared with his words, I can't believe my ears, I can't trust my body...what do you want from me?

Hehe well if I'm going to burn forever, I want it to be in your flames...my hothead, passionate, younger brother. 

"I love you too..."

***********************

Those words wash over my body, I knew it would feel this good. Though it was barley a whisper I heard them, the words I've only imagined in that cooling depth. An oasis in this desert of my life, a life filled with pain and loss; you are my saving grace Leonardo...and now your mine. 

Looking into your eyes I see the fear, the war is still waging in your heart even though you've confessed to your feelings. That damn honor of yours keeps you from seeing what this can be, what it is, isn't dirty. Your body is trembling so I hold you tighter, I'll be your strength like always. I'll catch you every time you fall apart. I will be everything, anything, you need.

"Don't be afraid, I call ya Fearless for a reason...." The melted pieces of your mask pool in those deep ocean eyes, I want you to forget....Forget your honor, your shame, forget what the others will think...let me love you.

"Don't run, don't hide, an' don't shut me out." Leaning into your frame my body covers yours. Shielding you from the spray that's gone cold, from the ice that threatens to conceal your heart once more, I will be that shield against it all. "I love ya Leonardo...an' I ain't gunna let anythin' take ya away from me." Finally you relax, the weight of your body grows as you slip away from this moment no doubt exhausted both physically and mentally. 

Turning the water to still, wrapping us both from the chill of the air, I carry my precious burden to his room. I explain to father he collapsed from his training and I'll keep vigil tonight, an excuse, but he consents. I know the  talk with father will have to come someday, but for now we'll hide. I'll burn for him and him alone, he'll cover me in refreshing faithfulness; together we'll make a world we both can love and live. 

But for now, as we lay side by side hidden beneath the folds of this simple blanket I am finally at peace. Years of Affliction and Carnage, I finally can hold the one thing that makes it Beautiful. Even in this shameful love we've found I am happy, I even find amusement in the conversation that dawn will bring. But if living a blessed life means living without him...then I've never been so grateful to be born

Damned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short I know but I couldn't get this one to leave me alone. Please let me know what you think about the title being first and last, about the perspective style, or about the "story" in general. This is VERY new to me but for some reason I'm enjoying this little drabble more than my usual lengthy stories. Are you? Should I go back to my longer chapters and leave this for play time? Please let me know....
> 
> Also thank all of you for your kind words and encouragement. I lost my love for writing years ago, and feared I had also lost my talent for it. But thanks to you loving and endearing people I've found my inspiration and love once more. So if this lone series is for anyone, I'd say it's for all the TMNT Fans that have helped me once more enjoy a lost love.
> 
> Thank you ^.^  
> -Nicoli 
> 
> Previous:[Carnage](http://fav.me/d8dx3wb) <...> Next: [Enthralled](http://fav.me/d8e3z9l)


	5. Enthralled

I'm hopeless.

Completely and terribly hopeless....

Maybe it's the mixture of instinct and the human complex known as rebound...It's irrational, superficial, and simply...well impossible!

Illogical, improbable, utterly useless! No sooner does she make her choice in a grief stricken moment of delusional euphoria I find a yearning for affection from one of my own kind. Some one who's known my loneliness, a comrade in hardships of the heart, that's all a simple trick of the mind to quell the turmoil of rejection. 

That's all.

So why can't I stop thinking about him?

About that innocent little joke? 

_"Hey Don now that April's outta the way, maybe now you'll give the Mikester a chance at your heart hehehe!"_

Was it simply a jest? Did he truly pine for my attention while I was fixated on her? He did bother me a lot but that's just how he is...isn't it? Sure he USED to cling to Leo and Raph when we were children but when we his puberty he naturally reached out to me since we're closer in age...right?

Ah! This is going nowhere! Well let's just explore the subject to get it out of mind. What do I find so attractive about...Mikey? Of all the mutated turtles in New York...well only four, three not counting me...FOCUS!

Mikey...Mikey...Mikey is...He's....

He's a breath of fresh air, like a clean wind that sweeps in when the rotting decay of life and sorrow threaten to overwhelm the senses completely. He's a refreshing summer wind to chase away the over baring heat of hate and prejudice of our lives. 

Further still you could even say he's like a moving, living, jovial sun himself. Melting away the winters of loneliness and bitterness from never have finding love. He warms the very air he brings with laughter and his own sense of freedom. 

He's ever changing his personality, there's nothing stable at all about him. But that is something to be admired. Never cant he wind flow through the same air twice right? Mikey is like the wind that brings change and growth in our home. The ever evolving world around us captivates him and like a rushing gale he sweeps it up in his merry manner and brings those changes through our lives.

Discovery, laughter, change, freedom, simply put he's the breath of life for this small yet hidden clan. How could I not have noticed him before now? The perfect subject for an ever curious mind such as mine. 

Oh no this isn't good...now I'm fully, terribly, completely 

Enthralled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Daww Mom you shouldn't have...I am pretty awesome aren't I?"
> 
> "Mikey! Humility is the best quilty of a ninja master..."
> 
> "Awe come off it Fearless, you're just jealous dat Mikey and Don's views are happier and less dramatic....though with a stiff like you makes sense hehehe"
> 
> "Am not! Raph if you weren't my mate in this I'd..."
> 
> "You'd wat oh mighty Leonardo?"
> 
> "N--No fair..."
> 
> "Ugh bros! Get your own space to do that!"
> 
> -__- Guys...seriously, you all begged for me to add the 'Plot Turtles' speech in the descriptions so..tell them your thoughts. LEO! RAPH! Stop that! No smexy stuff until your next chapter!
> 
> "Sorry!"
> 
> "....I really liked it, your use of simple terminology while also sounding intelligent is an amazement in itself. You really do have a remarkable style of writing. Thank you for making a dork like me sound so poetic."
> 
> Anytime Don ^.^
> 
>  
> 
> *all turtles* "So readers? What do you Think?"
> 
> Previous: [Damned](http://fav.me/d8dyc3l) <...>Next: [Fun](http://fav.me/d8fcrnx)


	6. Fun

(It's Mikey...come on ya think I'd pass this word up? Ok fair warning a bit of jumping around because it's Mikey)

Fun...hmmm...what's a turtle do for fun around here? Raph and Leo are finally gettin' it on, 'bout time yesh those dudes are thick. 

Dad's busy with his 'shows' so much for tv gameage...dude not cool! Well there's always...nah I really pushed it with that April comment, I better chill.

Feet why are you moving to D's lab? Come on little dudes I don't wanna bother....Don.

Man of all the mutated turtle bros in New York I'm so glad I've got Donnie. Ya I know not many but my point is still valid! He's awesome! Like totally down to earth and calm, and nice, and a good fighter, and....

Looking at him reminds me of when father took us to the park in fall. He's always moving and weaving like the blades of tall grass. He's even thin like grass. His soft mumbling reminds me of soft wind rushing by my ears. He's just so...alive!

The way he moves from place to place like a little critter but each place serves a purpose. He's always so grounded in his work, in us, like...like a tree. Ya!

Donnie's a tree and each part about him is like a branch. Moving with the wind, growing and changing but at the root it's all the same. Dude this is an appiffi, apanie, what's that big word...e _piphany Mikey_  woah even in my head he's smart! 

But ya back to the tree thing, he's just so..so solid. Ya solid is the best way to describe D. He's always firm in what he wants and will not let anything move him away from it, not even pizza. He stands strong for all of us when we don't know what to do or things get really tough, even Leo admires how fast his mind works. Sensei says Don has a flower inside that grows as he does.

I can totally see that, I bet it's a big purple one! Like a violet or forget me not. He's really beautiful too, wonder if he knows that? The strong firm curve of his legs from walking everywhere all day, all that bending and squatting down for parts made his tail end really tight too. I love looking at him! I like to draw him sometimes in a forest of bamboo, something about his height and form just reminds me of them. He bends, twists, and moves like stalks caught in a wind, especially when I'm around, he even whistle when he works and the bamboo shutes whistle when they move. He's perfect. No matter what he keeps strong to see everything through, even if he knows the chances are slim that it'll work out. He's pretty down to earth too, like tree roots, planted in his lab but still connected to everything...I like that about him...a lot.

I'd really like to hold him, to feel that solid body of his bend for me, to smell his skin and see if it's like pine, or juniper. I know what kind of soap he uses but I think his skin would be different. But I'm like totally drawn to him. It doesn't bother me, shell I knew I was gay when I say Raph working out without his mask and nearly dropped down in the dojo.

Not to say my other bros aren't totally hot in their own ways. Leo's steady and Raph is strong but Donnie's like my rock. If I wear in a relationship with him I'd be the one to take care of him as he grew like a tree...He's always taking care of us and protecting us with nothing more than his brains and a stick. That's pretty solid. 

Well looks like I found something to do, I got all worked up and this shell's getting tighter by the second think I'll head to the drainage pool, another awesome spot made by my sexy bro. I'll go for a swim and will totally have some private 

Fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ouch ok my head hurts from re-reading, re-writing, and making this. Welp here's MIKEY!!! I promise there will be more delicious Mikeyness soon but Raph and Leo are getting impatient. -_- *glares at plot turtles*
> 
> [](http://catloversjt.deviantart.com/art/Emoticon-TMNT-Raphael-399098948) :what you're the one who was begg'n for inspiration. so get in inspired...come 'ere fearless.
> 
> [](http://catloversjt.deviantart.com/art/Emoticon-TMNT-Leonardo-399491352) : Ah Raph n..not fair....
> 
> O.O Well tell me what you guys think in the comments I gotta get while the gettin's good!
> 
> Previous: [Enthralled](http://fav.me/d8e3z9l)<...> Next: [fav.me/d8h9moo](http://fav.me/d8h9moo)


	7. Granted

DonniexMikey 

How could I have taken him for Granted?

Those jovial eyes and whisping laughter, his sheer talent for making us smile. That light that draws us together like brothers yet...now...it seems a lot brighter for me. I'm not sure when it happened but ever since that day I can't stop thinking of him.

His voice whirling around the lair in a chorus of melodies that would make even the most talented birds envious. The humming deep within his chest as he focuses on beating one of our brothers in a new form of game. A dance of twists, turns, leaps, and dips carry him around our home and even above. I can't believe that I've missed it all until now! My obsessive behavior is getting dangerous. I want more than anything to capture this torrent of desire and lock him away in my arms. To capture the escape artist and trap him against my body, I want him...oh man.

I'm getting no where with this invention thinking like this, maybe a cold shower...looks like it's in use...now what? The pool! It's pretty late already but that just means I'll be able to be alone. The night is still so alive topside, I think even more so than the daylight hours. I'm glad though, it helps conceal our excitement while we swim. 

"Ohh yea...yessss"

What was that?!

"MMmm ya dude more. Ah yea Donnie..." 

M...Mikey! He's here? Well yea if he wanted to go swimming he'd head here. I mean it's only logical the most active of us would want to exercise in a comfortable...WAIT!!! Did he just say my name?

"Don, Don agh faster bro."

What on earth is he doing? Idiot you know what he's doing. That raspy voice, his quick breaths, and churring you know exactly what he's doing shell head. So why am I hiding like a child behind a barrel? This would be the prime time to embrace these urges and also satisfy his needs. So why can't I move?

"Ah ha, Donnie please...bro I haven't, haven't had release in weeks...please...uh uh yea"

Why is his voice so arousing all of a sudden to me? This smell...it's his...spice and sweet like cinnamon. I want more of it...I...I can't think....This tightness in my shell is getting harder to repress...

"DOOOOOOOONNNIE!!!! Almost there!"

Those cries I want to soothe them. My...my hands, I can't stop...his cries they're rushing over my skin. Ah sweet release, wait for me Mikey please...

 

"Ah ha, ung..." 

Huh? Man I was so close! I swear if it's Leo or Raph sportin' a hard on I'm gonna get laid!

"ha, uh..m..Mi...Mikey..." 

Woah that's Don! sounds like...he's behind the fire barrel. Must've came to chill and heard...oh man total embarrassment dude! But...

"Ang, ah..." Doesn't sound like he was hate'n the show maybe I should...nah I can wait. Besides kinda hot the two of us together not knowing the other was here...well back to business.

Yea Donnie work those strong legs for me, guess you're the smart one for a reason.

"Ha ugn Mi.Miiii"

So good ya can't finish my name huh? Yea bro I roll like that. 

"I..I can't...believe..." 

Man his voice is totally sexy, even trying to be quiet. That firm body feels so good, let loose and let me carry it all away bro. 

"Ah ah aha ha ha" 

I'm close to Don come on we'll do this together...

"Ah Donnie!"

"Mmmm MIKEY!"

 

Oh no did he hear that? Well does it matter he yelled my name. But it would look totally weird right? Oh shell what am I going to do?

"Hey you gunna come in here and clean up or take this nice warm water for

Granted?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ironically I conducted a scene like this for Leo and Raph on the roof tops and wanted to use it for C as Caught, but I think Damned worked out pretty well. But I jsut couldn't let that scene go so Thanks to Donnie and Mikey for falling into my little plot trap.
> 
> As usual let me know your thoughts in the comments though the next chapter will most likey be uploaded elsewhere due to the content.
> 
> Previous: [fav.me/d8fcrnx](http://fav.me/d8fcrnx) <....> Next: [fav.me/d8l6ucm](http://fav.me/d8l6ucm)
> 
> [](http://catloversjt.deviantart.com/art/Emoticon-TMNT-Michelangelo-399686371) Yeah dudes we got another chapter!! Oooo looks like there's some heavy stuff brewing.  
> [](http://catloversjt.deviantart.com/art/Emoticon-TMNT-Raphael-399098948) Mikey! You spoil it for the an I'll stick a sai in ya!  
> [](http://catloversjt.deviantart.com/art/Emoticon-TMNT-Donatello-399684988) Raph he didn't give anything away. He only commented on the obvious discomort Leo would have..mph  
> [](http://catloversjt.deviantart.com/art/Emoticon-TMNT-Leonardo-399491352) Like Raph said spoilers. Let's just let the readers find out for themselves.
> 
> -_-: Oh look guys pizza!
> 
> [](http://meninasuitcase.deviantart.com/art/PizzaParty-178405677) PIZZA!!!!


	8. Heaven

Heaven

I swear I've died an' gone ta heaven. We slept all night side by side, I could finally hold 'em close an' not have ta punch 'im. His breath warmed my chest all through tha night. I had ta pinch myself over an' over thinkin' I was dreamin'. But no Leonardo, the fearless leader, was sleepin' in tha same bed wit me. We were entangled togetha all night long. I swear I feel like I've just slept in a bed of clouds for months, my body isn't sore from tossing and turning, my mind feels at ease...I'm not waking up with a headache from going ta bed angry. This...this is tha way you're suppose ta feel afta sleepin', how I wanna feel every mornin'.

"Mmm" Hehe he's kinda cute when he's sleepin'. I wonder if he's gunna regret last night. If he'll feel bad about sleepin' wit me. Damn please don't wake up...let me dream a bit longa.

"Mnh...wha...what time is it?" Well it was nice while it lasted...

"R..Raph!?" Here we go. 

"Hey Leo..."

~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~  
Hell

I must be in hell, it's so hot. This burning around me, the heat alone can suffocate me. I knew it, just like every night I think of him and I'm in hell. These dishonorable thoughts and shameful desires, I know it's wrong but why? Why did I have to want him? It's so hot....damnit...wait...

The heat's gone...no it's...calming. This feeling of warmth...it reminds me of him. I love early mornings in the lair. Laying my bed beneath the covers I can let my mind imagine his arms holding me, so warm and strong, his chest smooth and cool like a refreshing pillow, the soft rumble of his breath...  
"Mmmmm" it feels so nice. I'd stay like this forever if I could, hehe yea right father would kill me if I was late for practice. Practice....ugh I don't want to get up...

"Mnh..wha...what time is it?" where's my clock? What's...soft, warm, hard...what is in my bed?

"R..Raph?!"

What?! What is he doing in my bed!? Wait last night...it wasn't a dream...we...he...I...oh man...

"Hey Leo.." damn why is his voice so soft...I just can't kick him out now can I? Shell what am I going to do about this? I can't just...I mean we can't...and father...and the others....what the shell....

Oh man this is bad...but it feels so right.   
"Mphf ha..Raph..."

"Yea fearless?"

"Kiss me again."

~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~*~~~~~~  
 Damn I love the way you ask for me, well if you insist. 

Is till can't get enough of this, please Leo don't regret this, I can't stop now. 

I don't care where we end up but I'm not gunna let you go come Heaven or Hell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the wait my husband put me on probation...lol this is what I get for being a little obessive in my writting. Well here we are the next bit. Will there be more? Who knows.
> 
> Previous: [Granted](http://fav.me/d8h9moo) <..>Next: Got any ideas? Tell me what you think should come next.
> 
> [](http://catloversjt.deviantart.com/art/Emoticon-TMNT-Raphael-399098948) : Did you seriously just let this end with a kiss!? What the shell!? You promised some hot stuff wit me an' fearless!  
> [](http://catloversjt.deviantart.com/art/Emoticon-TMNT-Leonardo-399491352) : Raph you're not helping. There's an order to things and you must...  
> [](http://catloversjt.deviantart.com/art/Emoticon-TMNT-Raphael-399098948) : Leo I swear I'll take you right now if you don't...Hey what the...let...me...stop...that....  
> [](http://catloversjt.deviantart.com/art/Emoticon-TMNT-Leonardo-399491352) : Raph remember our talk about the author and not to push your luck?
> 
> *I'm sorry the plot turtle you're trying to reach is currently unavailable. Please go back to where you came from and try back next chapter...*
> 
>  
> 
> [](http://catloversjt.deviantart.com/art/Emoticon-TMNT-Leonardo-399491352) : -_- I tried to warn him.


	9. Impending

Impending doom.

Certainly it is this that my sons fear from the recent change in their relationship. They walk with heads burdened with guilt and fear, once bright flames are dimmed with uncertainty, I am both saddened and amused by this. Surely they all have tried to hide the growing winds that pass from one heart into the other even in my old age I can sense the fires of love. 

A calm stream now a rushing rapid river heated by the phoenix's own embers. His wild fire now tamed by love and patience that comes from sitting close to a babbling brook. 

The whirl wind tundra that would blow fervently through our home has settled into a joyous breeze within the enfolding branches of an sturdy oak. The tree once lonely and still now sings with the soft laughter that rustles his leaves. 

Over the world hidden in darkness I feel the cloud of shame hanging on the young shoulders. I also fear this is my doing, instead raising them as warriors in a clan I have fed them the lessons of brotherhood and restrictions of social acceptance. Though my heart is pained by the resistance for them to confide in me, as a father I find a ray of joy in how they respect our teachings of honor. 

Well it is high time the rain that falls upon the earth is lifted with the smile of the sun. I cannot allow them to suffer this storm of doubt any further.


	10. Judgement

Judgment

That's what we must be here for. Master never calls us in at the middle of the day unless it's something like this. We've been too different, to careless, all of us. I...I should've known better than to let this happen. I should have stopped it. Now, now we all will be buried beneath this shame, already it's hands are choking the breath from me, I...I can't breath the impending darkness threatens to swallow me whole again. I, I don't want to go back to that cold loneliness, I can't burn in that hell any longer. Not since ever knowing the warmth of him, his burning love. Please...please father don't make me return to that abyss. I can't take it. 

_Leo!_

Damn it, I knew somethin' was up. Masta callin' us in like this and Leo turned ghost white. I could feel it sitting next to him. That calm mask broken and the ice around his heart trying to consume it. I won't let it happen again. Please Masta don't tare us apart, this ain't wrong. We're happy, we're in love, it ain't wrong! Leo...no...the torrent is taking over. He's scared, so scared I want to take it away. Let me burn away that fear, I will protect you. _Leo!_ Damn he passed out. Forget hide'n I won't let him get swallowed by that damn cold mask of his again. Leo...can you feel it? My heart is burning, my body is on fire, my mind is melted mush...It's all for you.

_My sons...it pains me greatly to see you suffer so. Your brother has already succumbed to his fears and shame. That is my fault. Before you take him Raphael, you must all hear what I have to say about this new bond that has come to you boys._

Father...he's in pain...I can see it. Mikey often spoke of seeing it in his eyes when we were sure he saw something we meant to hide. But...I don't feel disappointment or anger in his sorrow. This wind I hear...thanks to Mikey...I can hear it, father's wishes. He wants us to be happy. We hurt him, we his our feelings from him, because we were afraid....oh father please forgive us. 

Dad's so sad. I knew he wouldn't flip out, but trying to uproot those ideas from any of them was impossible. Truth told I was scared too, scared of when I told Master Splinter that Don was my peace...that Don would be angry...he'd leave me...But I should've anyway. We made that look on our master's face, we should've been good sons and told him what we all felt...but now...

_My boys, I am greatly troubled that you sought to hide your love for another from me. Though I raised you as brothers I am not so cruel to deny you love. These bonds will bring you closer as a clan, stronger as ninja, and happiness as my sons._

Did...did I hear that right? Did father just give us his blessing? I think...I'm gunna..

_Raph! Raphael!_

_Woah those two dudes must've seriously been stressing this. I wonder how long they've been hiding it?_

_Who knows Mikey. But I think that they were so worried only shows how much they respect Master Splinter and his teachings._

_Yes my son. Indeed Leonardo and Raphael are the strength and honor of our clan, but I believe they are still very young in the ways of the world, love included. Come, let us leave them in peace to awaken together. Though I will say this, I will not permit dishonorable acts in the dojo...or the family swimming hole._

We're free, all those worries and shame are gone. I can't resists the calling wind any further. I must have him, all of him. That refreshing breeze that calms my scattered head, his breath of love stolen by my lips, I can't take no for an answer. _Mikey_

Way ahead of you bro. I can feel you rustling with need to be with me, those strong arms around my body are all I need. This room, smells fresh and strong like you. So clean and perfect, it's limited use makes me think you need to be here more. The smell of the earth around us clings to you and your bed. I want to drown in it. I want to be confined by it. Please _Donnie_.... 

I'm free, this rushing wave of freedom coursing through me with each movement. The hot winds encasing me pull me deeper and further in. I'm choking on his laughter, the quick breaths he gasps my name and I can't take it back. I want to plant myself in every fiber of him. I push deeper, digging my very roots into his flesh. I must capture this wind that has ripped apart my still world. I must take every breath from him and wrap it my folds forever.

So solid, and firm. He's not yielding, he won't stop no matter how I try to turn the tide his stands firm with me. I love it. I love being grounded in his grasp, the wisps of his lips, the strength in his arms, every grain of his soul buried inside me. Inside my heart, I'll take it all, everything he can give, everything I've wanted. I'll take it. I don't mind a cage of vines and leaves, I'll rush anywhere to be held by calming branches, I'll surrender to you. 

No matter the storm, how deep the sea, or hallow the darkness. I know my sons will fight together, live together, and together find the best

Judgment.


	11. Kindred Spirits

Kindred Spirits are free, they love and laugh, cry and lament, such strong spirits never find rest until they find each other. Such moving winds flow through times in rapid torrents that fate itself cannot hinder their path. So passionate, yet fluid, raging through time and space only to find that calm lake of peace. 

I imagine that two such spirits found their path to my sons, one quick and blazing as the sun, shining it's own path through the darkness of doubt an pain. Using only it's strength to press onward in the winding journey of destinies. The other, a cool rushing stream following the path forded in fire to calm it's rage much like the rain after an eruption it creates new land from ferocity. So different yet their paths are the same merging to one another as stars in the galaxy crossing paths. 

It is both rare and beautiful to witness such a union. I found my path to true happiness once, how could I deny them what I know to be true and miraculous. 

My beautiful Tang Shen, we will find happiness again I am sure for we too are Kindred Spirits.


	12. Lasting

Lasting

I hope against all hopes that this feeling is lasting, that it will never fade or end. The dream I never want to awaken from. I can't endure this life alone, this bitter cold existence we were born into; without his fire I'll die of the cold...I...I want to live. I want to live with him, for him, beside him. If father sends him away for these feelings then I'll follow. FATHER! I must wake up, I have to face father, I have to fight for this...I....

"Leo." His voice. "Leo wake up." It's so close, is he here? Yes! That warmth, I know it well better than any blanket or heater, I know his scent as it fills my nose like the finest fragrance. "Leonardo Hamato Wake up!" 

The lights are dim, I smell incense, we're still in the dojo? Looking I find his eyes, those blazing suns that shine with the luminesce of golden sun. Liquid fire burns behind those eyes and I've never more wanted to be consumed than now. If I must lose him then I wish to hold him "one last time..." 

~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~  
Mngh man what did I fall asleep on? Did I fall outta my ham.."Leo?" Right, father called us here to give us his blessing. Leo doesn't know it's ok, we can be free to be in love..Leo... Sleeping like this he's at peace, a feeling I bet he hasn't had since we began to hide this. But now, now we are able to be in love like we wanna, I can hold him without fear of him running away. "Leo wake up." I wanna hold 'im now, I wanna refresh myself in his drowning embrace, feel his body rush over mine cleansing the darkness inside my soul. 

I can't contain myself further. "Leonardo Hamato Wake up!" Those searching eyes, always so alert when he awakens. I could be forever lost to the depth of blue in his eyes. 

"one last time.." He believes we were punished, damned to never be togetha again. 

"No. Forever." I'll bring you to the brink of oblivion brother, I'll melt your soul until you you have nothing left but a desire for me. 

"Forever Leo. You're mine." I will wrap these arms around you until I break the shell that freezes your fears, with my own power I will carve a path deeper into you than any blade could ever hope to. You are mine, my fluid of life the living water that flows through my body, finally I've captured all that I ever wanted and I'll be damned to the deepest fires of hell before I let it go. 

*~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~  
Such passion! As if you haven't burned me enough! "Forever." Yes! Forever I'll be yours no matter what this life brings us I can't be without you. "R-Raph-" no gentle caresses, no soothing words, I just want him! All his fire all his rage, that volcano of liquid fire I need it, I want you to drive it deep inside and flood by body with your fire. 

"Yes! Raph more!" I need more, I need to perish in this fire. "I-I need-" Your lips are a furnace of burning ash and coals that ignite the passionate fires deep within me. This fire I can't let go of, this burning heat consuming my being, I no longer fear the pits of brimstone and rivers of fire...because I know you are there. Your fire is creation of that world, so long as I am in that inferno..."You're mine."   
~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And so they loved deeper, freer, more honest, and more passionate than any could have ever imagined for these four singular beings doomed to a life of shadow and longevity. A life fate may have dealt as a hand of sorrow and seclusion. But even fate could not begin fathom the endless possibilities the universe is privileged to, what surprises this existence can hold, and what boundless miracles love can bring about. In nights filled with love eternal, days of loyal hearts, as well as millennia filled with ups and downs; no devotion was ever as true and glorious as these four who always shared the mysteries of 

LOVE EVER LASTING

END.


	13. Monster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Second Series of Drabbles begins here

Monster, menace, ugly, demon.   
I've heard them all, seen the fear in the eyes of those I protect.  
Fear of me.   
No matter what I say, or do, no matter how much good my brothers and I accomplish they see us as the same scum. 

Freaks and monsters roaming the night waiting in shadows to attack and take everything from them. 

I can't take it! I can't stand that haunting fear staring at me!

I may not be human but I have feelings too! 

I can be mad, I can be hurt, I can laugh, I can cry, I can-love. 

Love? Who would love a freak like me? Who would even dare look twice at this face and body of mine and see me for who I really am? 

What can I possibly hope to hear from anyone other than screams of terror or gasps of shock?

Wake up and smell the stale coffee! Nothing, no one, no where will see me as anything other than this. 

A Monster.


	14. Notice

Notice me, as I notice you.  
Look at me as to you I do. 

I see the pain you try to hide,  
In me I beg you will confide. 

I see it in the way you walk,  
I hear it in the words you talk. 

That pain frustration locked in your heart,  
I begging please give me a start. 

In your eyes I see the shadows, the pain, they've made you weary,  
Even as you utter assurance trudging toward your sanctuary. 

I see you brother though you may pretend  
I see the sorrow as each night comes to end. 

Each night above brings new terror to you mask,  
I want to comfort your heart but am afraid to ask. 

Do not listen to the blind above  
See in here in my heart so filled with love.

A passion I've long kept hidden,  
A desire so sinful and forbidden. 

It hurts me deep within my heart  
To see you tear yourself apart. 

But all I can do is watch from afar  
I cannot help you from where you are. 

I swear I could keep you better than another,  
Even with the shameful truth that you're my brother. 

So please look to me and see all that is.   
Please look to me, please Notice.


	15. Obey

Why must we fall at his feet? 

Why do I kneel before a master instead of sit at the feet of a father?

What about this is fatherly? 

One question, 

One confide,

For all my courage this is his answer.

Dishonorable, 

A disgrace,

The mark of shame on the clan; the lowest of the low. 

May as well be a Foot soldier for him to kick and torment.

Why can't he see I needed something?

Anything to tell me I'm not all screwed up.

To tell me that there was more to this life than kill or be killed.

All I wanted was an answer.

A word of kindness that he's always given to them...

Them, my brothers. Brother...

I hate that word.

I'm not a human! I'm not his son!

His son...

That must be why.

Why I am the black mark.

Why I have to be perfect unless someone finds out he's not the Dad of the year. 

Why is wrong!? 

Why does the way I feel have to be damned!?

I can't help it. I don't want to stop.

To forget.

To go cold. 

I want....

Him. 

Why? Why do I have to be the perfect son? 

Why do we have to be perfect soldiers? 

Why do we have to....

Obey?


End file.
